168: You're Doing Feedback Wrong. With Dr Olivia Oginska

Ask most vets what feedback means, and they'll think of a meeting. Once a year - maybe someone explaining that you're not billing enough.

Dr Liv Oginska reckons that meeting is barely feedback at all.

Because real feedback is happening all day: the look on your face when someone walks in, whether you say the thing you've been wrestling with for three weeks, or take it home and complain about it to your partner instead.

There's a famous quote: 'The single biggest problem in communication is the illusion that it has taken place.'

In this episode, we fix that. Liv shows what to actually say when someone goes straight to defensive, why you should never label their emotion, and the work you need to do on yourself first. Plus her practical advice on receiving feedback well.

Dr Olivia Oginska is a vet, emotional intelligence specialist, certified workplace conflict mediator, lecturer at Murdoch University and founder of Human-Savvy. She's also just published research examining the links between feedback skills, psychological safety and turnover intention in veterinary organisations. In other words: does the way we talk to each other influence whether people want to leave? (Spoiler: it matters!)

Somewhere in your practice there's a conversation nobody is having. It's already changing how everyone behaves.

This episode is about having it.

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Episode guide

This guide expands on the research and practical feedback tools discussed in the episode. It is designed for veterinary leaders and team members who want clearer, safer workplace conversations.

What is feedback in a veterinary team?

Feedback is often treated as a formal event: an annual review, a performance meeting or a conversation that begins with “we need to talk”. Liv offers a broader definition. Feedback is the flow of information between people, and it happens constantly.

It includes spoken comments, but also whether someone is invited into a discussion, how a colleague reacts to a question, the expression on a leader’s face, and whether concerns are welcomed or quietly punished. These interactions teach people what is safe to say, whose contribution is valued and how much honesty the team can tolerate.

Not all feedback is useful. A frown, a slammed door or silent exclusion communicates something, but gives the other person little constructive information. Useful feedback improves understanding, strengthens the relationship or helps someone decide what to do differently.

What did Dr Olivia Ogińska’s research examine?

Liv’s published cross-sectional study explored associations between three elements in veterinary organisations:

• the quality of feedback exchanged within teams and between supervisors and employees;
• psychological safety within the team;
• employees’ intention to leave their role.

The study found associations between these factors. It did not prove that poor feedback directly causes low psychological safety or that either factor directly causes someone to leave. The research was based on self-reported data from veterinary professionals in Australia and the UK, so it cannot establish causation or necessarily be generalised to every veterinary workplace.

The findings still matter because they identify feedback as a practical interpersonal skill that teams can examine and improve. They also point towards further research into whether changing feedback practices produces measurable changes in team experience and retention.

What does psychological safety look like at work?

Psychological safety means that team members believe they can take interpersonal risks without being humiliated, rejected or punished. Those risks include asking questions, admitting uncertainty or a mistake, expressing a different opinion, raising a patient-safety concern, setting a boundary, or giving a leader difficult feedback.

It does not mean avoiding accountability or accepting harmful behaviour. Liv describes it as the ability to be an imperfect human, speak honestly and be met with curiosity and compassion, while remaining responsible for one’s actions.

Feedback has to travel in both directions

Veterinary teams often picture feedback flowing from a manager to an employee. A psychologically safer culture also allows it to move upwards and sideways.

Employees need to be able to tell leaders when workload, pay, career development, management support or team dynamics are becoming unsustainable. Leaders cannot respond to information they never receive. Team members also influence whether leaders feel safe enough to address problems. Retaliation, hostility or prolonged withdrawal after an imperfect attempt at feedback makes the next honest conversation less likely.

Liv’s call to both sides is straightforward: leaders must learn to give feedback skilfully, and team members must develop the capacity to receive it without immediately rejecting the information.

Behaviours that damage psychological safety

Several patterns make people more cautious about speaking honestly:

• immediate blame and finger-pointing;
• unfiltered emotional reactivity or retaliation;
• dismissing another person’s emotional experience;
• unpredictable moods or responses;
• incivility, exclusion and small interpersonal punishments;
• avoiding important conversations until resentment accumulates.

Predictability can be protective. A leader does not need to agree immediately with every concern. It is often safer to respond consistently: listen, acknowledge the information, ask for time to think, and return to the conversation as promised.

A practical process for giving difficult feedback

The episode includes a roleplay in which a leader must tell a veterinarian that a client has complained. Liv’s approach can be adapted to many workplace conversations:

1. Prepare yourself first. Notice whether you have already judged the person or decided what happened. If you cannot approach the conversation with genuine curiosity, prepare with a coach or skilled co-leader, or ask a more neutral person to lead it.
2. Explain the purpose and remove unnecessary threat. Say that feedback has been received and that you want to understand the person’s perspective. The first conversation is for gathering information, not delivering a pre-decided verdict.
3. Expect an emotional response. Feedback can threaten someone’s identity, particularly when it touches their competence, integrity or care for patients. Defensiveness does not automatically mean the feedback is wrong or the person is unwilling to improve.
4. Acknowledge emotion without naming it for them. Avoid “you’re angry” or “you’re overreacting”. Acknowledge the strong response and ask whether the person wants to continue now or return after some time to process.
5. Gather facts when both people can think clearly. Write down what happened from the employee’s perspective and separate observation from assumption.
6. Make a shared plan. Discuss what each person could do differently, what support is needed and how the team will reduce the chance of a repeat. The objective is learning and accountability, not winning.

How to receive feedback without shutting the conversation down

Receiving feedback can feel like a threat to identity. When the information feels overwhelming, Liv suggests:

1. listen without immediately arguing the case;
2. thank the person for raising it;
3. say that you need time to think;
4. agree on when you will return to the conversation;
5. seek coaching or therapeutic support if accepting feedback is a persistent barrier to growth.

This response does not require immediate agreement. It keeps the information available long enough to consider whether any part of it is useful.

Feedback starts the repair, but cannot fix every workplace problem

Pay, workload, work-life balance, career stagnation and management structures require practical solutions. Feedback alone will not solve them. It determines whether leaders know that a problem exists and whether both sides can discuss realistic options before someone leaves.

Frequently asked questions

Is feedback the same as a performance review?

No. A performance review is one formal event. Feedback also occurs through daily conversations, reactions, invitations, questions and non-verbal behaviour.

Does psychological safety mean tolerating poor behaviour?

No. Psychological safety combines curiosity and compassion with accountability. People should be able to be imperfect and honest, but remain responsible for how their behaviour affects others.

How should a leader respond when an employee becomes defensive?

Stay curious, reduce unnecessary threat and acknowledge the strong response without labelling the emotion. Offer time to process, then return to the facts and agree on a constructive plan.

Can better feedback stop veterinary employees from leaving?

The study found associations between feedback skills, psychological safety and turnover intention. It did not establish that better feedback directly prevents people from leaving. Retention is also influenced by compensation, workload, career development, support and team dynamics.

About Dr Olivia Ogińska

Dr Olivia Ogińska, also published online as Olivia Oginska, is a veterinarian, emotional-intelligence specialist, certified workplace conflict mediator, lecturer at Murdoch University and founder of Human-Savvy. Her work focuses on emotional skills, feedback, leadership and healthier relationships within veterinary teams.

Resources and links

• Liv's work: Human-Savvy A new cohort of the year-long Human-Savvy League leadership mastermind opens in October 2026.
• The Human-Savvy Symposium - a full day of this, in person, Brisbane, Friday 6 November 2026.
• Stuck on a case and want a specialist's eyes on it? Come and ask in our specialist support space.
• Close to 700 clinical episodes with full show notes: thevetvault.com (click "clinical content")
• Vets on Tour - Italy 2027 and the Serengeti with Prof Jill Maddison and Prof Dave Church: vetsontour.com

Topics and time stamps

Why Liv Researched This Topic (4:40)

Personal Feedback Stories: Good and Bad (8:11)

Sponsor Break (12:24)

Feedback Is Constant, Not Just Formal (13:17)

Defining Psychological Safety (19:48)

Personality, Environment, and Fear of Conflict (23:32)

Two-Way Feedback: Leaders and Employees (26:12)

Behaviours That Destroy Psychological Safety (31:15)

Handling Defensiveness (33:29)

Practical Roleplay: Giving Difficult Feedback (37:17)

Feedback vs. Other Causes of Turnover (42:53)

A Vision for the Future of the Profession (47:14)

Closing Thoughts (49:52)